Both of us are the same. We say the same things, but the only thing that is different is that one has body language, and one doesn't.
One speaks via her hands, the other through her mouth.
One communicates more than the other.
One communicates better than the other.
One of us is an image, the other, an object.
Let's talk about something else, shall we?
SAFE classes started, and they are quite tiring, it took me a lot of resolve to get back to reading and re reading 8 kgs, worth of text, a not- at-all-fun-and-not-the-way-hols-should-be-spent task.
A lot more than studying goes on in class, esp with cellphones, I'm beginning to hate the damn gadgets, it spoils the natural way of communication. Thanks to the ingenious invention, there
was a lot going on, that i wasn't even aware about! Well, I was in the first row, and if i so badly wanted to know, should have sat in the middle right?
So i got to know, not that i asked! They just said. It's a better choice, patience. A much better choice. I'm glad I didn't impose myself. Life teaches tough lessons well.
And now i have to cope up with another human being, just like me.
How many people leave and enter my life everyday? Just like my thoughts. Uncountable.
Me and zokra broke our call record today a straight 124 minutes talking. Well, that's normal, we haven't conversed for such a long time! I'm glad i called, she was pretty happy that i did.
She thought we wouldn't talk at all, i think we left gaps here and there. I'm glad I took tht first step, i knew she wouldn't call. After all, it was me who had left calls unanswered, and messages unreplied ( i don't know if that's a word), in the past. but hey, those were not because of misunderstandings, I just was stupid.
And I'm on track, the continuous phone calls have ensued, weve stopped using our cellphones, we communicate.
There's a lot that's coming back to me now, and we will always be together. I just had to take the first step, and it led me back to my old ways. together, forever, we're all different, in a good way, we make each other strong, we rock !
And that is the best way to describe us. The best.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Thursday, March 27, 2008
The Storm
It all started in the evening, a nice gentle rain, with the current fluctuating, and the UPS's capacity varying.
I tried to finish writing my friend a testimonial, and it took 3 reboots to submit it! The rain soon became a downpour.
Me and mom both love jumping in the rain, to smell the wet mud, to feel the cold water, to feel in tune with nature. We were considering doing that when the first flash of lightning came, followed by thunder. Thunder storms frighten me a bit, they only remind me of being alone, and having scary monsters in the dark, but ya, who would be scared at 7pm? I wasn't . But I wasn't going to go into the rain.
Somehow, i don't know if something was wrong with my eyes, but the houses all around mine had all turned yellow! And the sky a muky grey, it was such a dampening sight, and in not much time, the entire surrounding was dark. I couldn't see much.
So in the night, all i could see was lightning flashes and the sound of thunder rumbling. I thought the rain would end by around tenn, yet it went on and on and on! I normally sit till around 1 and then sleep, cause its silent at that time. Yesterday, it wasn't, and i didn't like it!
I was scared to g downstairs for a glass of water! I'm not afraid of the dark, its just the grotesque shapes the lightning forms in the dark that scare me. So i just sat. sat. sat. I couldn't read, couldn't sleep, and all that. I ended up sleeping at 2 am, I just hope it doesn't rain that bad today!
But i approximated the distance the lightning had from the house. That part was the most fun. Otherwise, i was just fixed. just fixed.
I tried to finish writing my friend a testimonial, and it took 3 reboots to submit it! The rain soon became a downpour.
Me and mom both love jumping in the rain, to smell the wet mud, to feel the cold water, to feel in tune with nature. We were considering doing that when the first flash of lightning came, followed by thunder. Thunder storms frighten me a bit, they only remind me of being alone, and having scary monsters in the dark, but ya, who would be scared at 7pm? I wasn't . But I wasn't going to go into the rain.
Somehow, i don't know if something was wrong with my eyes, but the houses all around mine had all turned yellow! And the sky a muky grey, it was such a dampening sight, and in not much time, the entire surrounding was dark. I couldn't see much.
So in the night, all i could see was lightning flashes and the sound of thunder rumbling. I thought the rain would end by around tenn, yet it went on and on and on! I normally sit till around 1 and then sleep, cause its silent at that time. Yesterday, it wasn't, and i didn't like it!
I was scared to g downstairs for a glass of water! I'm not afraid of the dark, its just the grotesque shapes the lightning forms in the dark that scare me. So i just sat. sat. sat. I couldn't read, couldn't sleep, and all that. I ended up sleeping at 2 am, I just hope it doesn't rain that bad today!
But i approximated the distance the lightning had from the house. That part was the most fun. Otherwise, i was just fixed. just fixed.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
The untitled title
I was listening to fly- by hilary duff,
i'm a music addict, most of my posts are about music, here's the video, you've gotta see it, the music is the most imp part!
You know you better than anyone else - Is that line really true?
I really don't know, people say that no1 knows more about you than your parents.
MAybe its true. I like myself. I accept myself. I have to accept my surroundings too.
Awesome, are we ever going to move on from philosophy.
Grandad fell down and got stiches done. As to how it happened, its a mystery. Grandmom was very strong, normally she goes hysterical. Both of them are fighters, just like my late grandfather. My other grandmom is weak, ever since he died.
THey'll all make it through, mom used the blessing to help him, she even helped my ex bf with it. He was so emotional after she did it!. He never used to believe in this stuff, now he's so different.
But yea, haven't even kept in touch for quite some time.Why did I bring him up?
I'd have dedicated the song tattoo- jordin sparks to him. Both of us were quite high minded.
He's long gone, gotta stay with my current. I would dedicate the song to him - A new day - by celine dion
Its so perfect. A great song too. I love her voice, its so full of volume.
O yes, i finally finished the game my friend sent me - and now i am the ruler of fognaria, i defeated the emperor- marsdos. That's what i call effective battle, i succeded after trying 4 times! What perseverance! Wah wah!
Oh ya, me and my kleptomaniac friend were chatting about the so called "importance" of economics , in a person's life.
Very successfully, i proved him wrong, but the ultimate debate is yet to begin, and ive gotten all prepared. What bull!! I never prepare, with him, I'm more spontaneous. And i never think when it comes to talking to him, a conversation just pops up somehow, we just get into the thread of conversation, It just amazes me at times!
How does it happen?
Talking is an art, and talking the way people expect you to is a skill, and I'm not very advanced at that art.
You would most probably find me blabbering shit, or I listen, i listen a lot. I also talk sense. and nonsense. I talk nonsense when I'm all uninterested, or when I've got too much to tell.
Why am I sometimes the opposite of myself?
Have i not found what is right and what is wrong?
Patti says that there are 15 years of suffering every human being suffers from, it comes with a break of seven and a half plus seven and a half years. She says that a person, even if he /she puts in the best effort, will never get the deserved results.
But why? Is it superstition? Is there a reason for this? Why does everyone go through it?It is even fair? I don't think so. A person's efforts should be suitably rewarded.
Confound it!
Thanks for going so far, so much for my decision to stop blogging, I'm too much into it!
Maybe when i get to college I'll stop, maybe. I don't think there's much to read anyways, but right now, I blog because i want to , not because i'm some sort of tap from which water keeps bursting forth, to refresh people. THat's not me, that's not my blog.
I like my blog.
It's nice.
i'm a music addict, most of my posts are about music, here's the video, you've gotta see it, the music is the most imp part!
You know you better than anyone else - Is that line really true?
I really don't know, people say that no1 knows more about you than your parents.
MAybe its true. I like myself. I accept myself. I have to accept my surroundings too.
Awesome, are we ever going to move on from philosophy.
Grandad fell down and got stiches done. As to how it happened, its a mystery. Grandmom was very strong, normally she goes hysterical. Both of them are fighters, just like my late grandfather. My other grandmom is weak, ever since he died.
THey'll all make it through, mom used the blessing to help him, she even helped my ex bf with it. He was so emotional after she did it!. He never used to believe in this stuff, now he's so different.
But yea, haven't even kept in touch for quite some time.Why did I bring him up?
I'd have dedicated the song tattoo- jordin sparks to him. Both of us were quite high minded.
He's long gone, gotta stay with my current. I would dedicate the song to him - A new day - by celine dion
Its so perfect. A great song too. I love her voice, its so full of volume.
O yes, i finally finished the game my friend sent me - and now i am the ruler of fognaria, i defeated the emperor- marsdos. That's what i call effective battle, i succeded after trying 4 times! What perseverance! Wah wah!
Oh ya, me and my kleptomaniac friend were chatting about the so called "importance" of economics , in a person's life.
Very successfully, i proved him wrong, but the ultimate debate is yet to begin, and ive gotten all prepared. What bull!! I never prepare, with him, I'm more spontaneous. And i never think when it comes to talking to him, a conversation just pops up somehow, we just get into the thread of conversation, It just amazes me at times!
How does it happen?
Talking is an art, and talking the way people expect you to is a skill, and I'm not very advanced at that art.
You would most probably find me blabbering shit, or I listen, i listen a lot. I also talk sense. and nonsense. I talk nonsense when I'm all uninterested, or when I've got too much to tell.
Why am I sometimes the opposite of myself?
Have i not found what is right and what is wrong?
Patti says that there are 15 years of suffering every human being suffers from, it comes with a break of seven and a half plus seven and a half years. She says that a person, even if he /she puts in the best effort, will never get the deserved results.
But why? Is it superstition? Is there a reason for this? Why does everyone go through it?It is even fair? I don't think so. A person's efforts should be suitably rewarded.
Confound it!
Thanks for going so far, so much for my decision to stop blogging, I'm too much into it!
Maybe when i get to college I'll stop, maybe. I don't think there's much to read anyways, but right now, I blog because i want to , not because i'm some sort of tap from which water keeps bursting forth, to refresh people. THat's not me, that's not my blog.
I like my blog.
It's nice.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Chicken soup
Well, after 4 hours of continuous reviewing 11th grade portions , one does get bored, tired, and I wanted to do something. Not come online, not watch, i wanted to do something energy consuming.
And what I ended up doing? Reading chicken soup, and walking up and down the house.
Not remotely amusing.
Grooving to music would be better, but i love chicken soup.
Fine it may not teach us something new with every story, but its very nice, and i prefer reading it to reading Robin Cook. Blaaaaah!!! too technical!
I wish I had Dan brown books at home, I've read them all, but, I'd like to read them, keep them.
What bull! I know i hate keeping an entire shelf full of books, the organisation rubbish is frustrating.
That's what life is about. Organising, Planning, and arranging. YUCK!
I'd prefer being a kid again. Carefree.
I was chatting with ms ZYX yesterday, and she was telling me as to how sullen school was without us!!!, the old days!
It seems like ages ago, when we had our grad day!
M contacted me today, all's well with him. I'm content.
Oh ya! One of my friends has gone abroad for further studies. Remember the kleptomaniac i talked about? Him.
He's doing fine. In any case i don't miss him.
The only way we communicate is via net, and in any case, he's there when i am there.
Why would i miss him? He's my net pal!
BAck to basics' music for now!! IT rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And what I ended up doing? Reading chicken soup, and walking up and down the house.
Not remotely amusing.
Grooving to music would be better, but i love chicken soup.
Fine it may not teach us something new with every story, but its very nice, and i prefer reading it to reading Robin Cook. Blaaaaah!!! too technical!
I wish I had Dan brown books at home, I've read them all, but, I'd like to read them, keep them.
What bull! I know i hate keeping an entire shelf full of books, the organisation rubbish is frustrating.
That's what life is about. Organising, Planning, and arranging. YUCK!
I'd prefer being a kid again. Carefree.
I was chatting with ms ZYX yesterday, and she was telling me as to how sullen school was without us!!!, the old days!
It seems like ages ago, when we had our grad day!
M contacted me today, all's well with him. I'm content.
Oh ya! One of my friends has gone abroad for further studies. Remember the kleptomaniac i talked about? Him.
He's doing fine. In any case i don't miss him.
The only way we communicate is via net, and in any case, he's there when i am there.
Why would i miss him? He's my net pal!
BAck to basics' music for now!! IT rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, March 24, 2008
I'd lie
Omg, I happened to viewing the video - bleeding love, ballboy's reccomendation.
And then i came upon this hannah montana video, wwhich also had the song - Id lie - by taylor swift.
I fell in love with the song. IT is absolutely perfect. I've been listening to it ever since, and i don't know when im gonna stop!
Music can change the way a person thinks. It happens to me all the time. That's why i always listen to positive music, music with energy, not something that makes me fell hopeless.(most of the time, atleast.)
Many of my friends asked me why i started typing full hand, and honestly, i don't have an answer.
It's just that IVe got to answer a lot of mails formally, and i find it difficult, typing with abbreviations, so i make an effort to type fullhand, yea, if that's a reason.
One of my freinds was telling me how much he missed all the fun we had. Of all the times, we recently patched up.
I couldn't tolerate his behaviour!!! but now, it all seems s trivial, we accept each other for who we are. And that's how we are special.
Thanks a lot for making me realise that.
And then i came upon this hannah montana video, wwhich also had the song - Id lie - by taylor swift.
I fell in love with the song. IT is absolutely perfect. I've been listening to it ever since, and i don't know when im gonna stop!
Music can change the way a person thinks. It happens to me all the time. That's why i always listen to positive music, music with energy, not something that makes me fell hopeless.(most of the time, atleast.)
Many of my friends asked me why i started typing full hand, and honestly, i don't have an answer.
It's just that IVe got to answer a lot of mails formally, and i find it difficult, typing with abbreviations, so i make an effort to type fullhand, yea, if that's a reason.
One of my freinds was telling me how much he missed all the fun we had. Of all the times, we recently patched up.
I couldn't tolerate his behaviour!!! but now, it all seems s trivial, we accept each other for who we are. And that's how we are special.
Thanks a lot for making me realise that.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
In seventh heaven!
I think I just went mad.
I'm in seventh heaven! OMG ! I cannot believe what just happened. I think My mom would hav jumped 1 foot into the air when she saw me scream and jump all around the room!!!!!
All is calm now, but I' still quivering with anticipation and excitement, how is it going to be?
I keep analysing my emotions. Eurgh!
But he called! HE called He CALLED!
Omg , I think Im going to faint!
We toked and talked and takd and talked. Sigh~ When will I ever grow up?
You are soooooo delirious!, one of my friends tell me.
Defi, defi defi, im grinning from ear to ear, and everyone wonders who is gonna make the next move.
Oooooooh, what a day!, MY DAY! its one after the other.
Alright, time to get back onto some firmer ground, dad plans to make me join this crash course, and i don't know where ill be driving towards. PHHLAKAWAAKKKAA SPLAAAAT!
Yup, that describes me in a nutshell. It's time to lookup everything, that's become dusty in FB. Gotta lot to catch up over there. btw, hes on fb 2!
I don't think it would be easy to put my mind on studies now. Uh oh.
Ocean's eleven is worth watching. Its a nice story, and a nice plot.
Guru is ok, the only thing I'm fond of in the movie is its script, I'ts likeable, nothing great.
After seeing that movie 4 times, that's the only feedback i can give.
Well, what's new? everything! I've not only found something new, I'm looking forward to all that is there !!!
Ok, so whose in love?? dad asks, behind my shoulder.
pat comes the reply. Its not love dad, a lot lot more than that. It's called , the connection.
Hmmm, so he's gone, and ya, well, its true, whoever i interact with, we do have a connection. I didn't realise it at all. Ok i did, but what does interaction mean? Communacation, both ways.
So far so good. A connection is there, and whatever connects us could be anything. Who knows! I'm not going to try and figure that out, my mind would explode cosmically.
Well, alls well that ends well,
No wonder they say, loose connections! I know I've got many. Time to pull them all through.
Btw, Taurians rule! In the holi"battle" yesterday, me nd D, the girl next door used our pichkaris to the max! and in doing so, we "defeated th guys, but kudos to them, they kinda removed all the turmeric nd stuff from my hair!
It was fun. FUN! D was of great help, all those water buckets and pichkaris from her side won us the battle, and of course, so did the refree, our opposition's mom.
Gotta get outa back on my fb vampires zombies and slayers, gotta be a rank1!!!!back to the old days!
Zokra's oof to chennai till 27th. I'm missing her so. Wait till i tell her the good news!!!
I'm in seventh heaven! OMG ! I cannot believe what just happened. I think My mom would hav jumped 1 foot into the air when she saw me scream and jump all around the room!!!!!
All is calm now, but I' still quivering with anticipation and excitement, how is it going to be?
I keep analysing my emotions. Eurgh!
But he called! HE called He CALLED!
Omg , I think Im going to faint!
We toked and talked and takd and talked. Sigh~ When will I ever grow up?
You are soooooo delirious!, one of my friends tell me.
Defi, defi defi, im grinning from ear to ear, and everyone wonders who is gonna make the next move.
Oooooooh, what a day!, MY DAY! its one after the other.
Alright, time to get back onto some firmer ground, dad plans to make me join this crash course, and i don't know where ill be driving towards. PHHLAKAWAAKKKAA SPLAAAAT!
Yup, that describes me in a nutshell. It's time to lookup everything, that's become dusty in FB. Gotta lot to catch up over there. btw, hes on fb 2!
I don't think it would be easy to put my mind on studies now. Uh oh.
Ocean's eleven is worth watching. Its a nice story, and a nice plot.
Guru is ok, the only thing I'm fond of in the movie is its script, I'ts likeable, nothing great.
After seeing that movie 4 times, that's the only feedback i can give.
Well, what's new? everything! I've not only found something new, I'm looking forward to all that is there !!!
Ok, so whose in love?? dad asks, behind my shoulder.
pat comes the reply. Its not love dad, a lot lot more than that. It's called , the connection.
Hmmm, so he's gone, and ya, well, its true, whoever i interact with, we do have a connection. I didn't realise it at all. Ok i did, but what does interaction mean? Communacation, both ways.
So far so good. A connection is there, and whatever connects us could be anything. Who knows! I'm not going to try and figure that out, my mind would explode cosmically.
Well, alls well that ends well,
No wonder they say, loose connections! I know I've got many. Time to pull them all through.
Btw, Taurians rule! In the holi"battle" yesterday, me nd D, the girl next door used our pichkaris to the max! and in doing so, we "defeated th guys, but kudos to them, they kinda removed all the turmeric nd stuff from my hair!
It was fun. FUN! D was of great help, all those water buckets and pichkaris from her side won us the battle, and of course, so did the refree, our opposition's mom.
Gotta get outa back on my fb vampires zombies and slayers, gotta be a rank1!!!!back to the old days!
Zokra's oof to chennai till 27th. I'm missing her so. Wait till i tell her the good news!!!
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Updates.
Well, today was math, and that , my 12th CBSE exam ended, so does my school life. I'm now officially, an ex-NPS ite.
Oh joy!
Well, we also plan to play holi tomorrow, and be all natural, with natural colours, but lots n lots of water balloons. And the pichkari, of course.
So me and my bro used up an entire hour and a half filling up those water balloons he bought from the store.Back pain, after all that continuous bending down, refilling, bending down, picking up, all that.
Who cares? PAin lasts for such less time.
Well, gave all the bye bye "gifts", and went to the prefects house for lunch and a sorta get together.And we saw shivaji, starrign rajnikanth, age 58.
As zokra aptly put it - "it was stupidly funny"
WE had fun.laughing, talking, reminscing, everything.
One more cherished memory,
bye tuki, bye cuci, bye sage, bye everyone. It was well worth it/
Oh joy!
Well, we also plan to play holi tomorrow, and be all natural, with natural colours, but lots n lots of water balloons. And the pichkari, of course.
So me and my bro used up an entire hour and a half filling up those water balloons he bought from the store.Back pain, after all that continuous bending down, refilling, bending down, picking up, all that.
Who cares? PAin lasts for such less time.
Well, gave all the bye bye "gifts", and went to the prefects house for lunch and a sorta get together.And we saw shivaji, starrign rajnikanth, age 58.
As zokra aptly put it - "it was stupidly funny"
WE had fun.laughing, talking, reminscing, everything.
One more cherished memory,
bye tuki, bye cuci, bye sage, bye everyone. It was well worth it/
Monday, March 17, 2008
Quawali,
Well, bio just got over and ive got math in a few days, on 20th, to be precise.
After that - it will be mauja hi mauja - but only for a few days i suppose, ya, with my parents around, Ive got no choice but to prepare for the other xams that are coming.
:(
Well, the near future is not something i look forward to.
There's nothing in it, nothing at all, it literally is moving on, growing up, letting go, and all that.
wonder if ill get a college in blore.
Man, allopathic docs have such an aversion towards ayurveda!!
Talking about aversions, I'm trying to overcome the stupid aversion i have towards practicing calculus!
There's no secret at all, i just sit with someone and do it, well, so there's no distractions and stuff, but i resent this sort of math all the time.
Give me totalling, simple math, arithmetic, neat algebra, with trigs, or logs, ill do it!
But calculus? Integration? It does not seem to fit anything ! It totally defies the logic i have, and i have very little patience with it.
Its stupid.
Math can be fun. Dad says it's a mental block I have, well, that's not completely true.
I just see no particular help that integrating 1 +logx/ log x would have,
ok well that sum is stupid, ne1 can solvge it,
it was just an wxample, but its useless!!!!!! There's nothing satisfying in doing worthless sums like them!
Ok, so you're looking for satisfaction in math too?
Defi!!!I love solving problems!
Looking at all that integration makes my stomach go phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
Or maybe I'm just hungry. Gotta grab a "bite" then!
Uh oh, eating with mehendi on my hands, will not be easy, hey, they should have that as a task for Roadies 5.0!!!! :)
Its a stupid task anyways, but its worth trying!
When i say fine, doesn't mean its all right. It means whatever. It means i have no choice, that reminds me , thats what SSR was talking about yesterday, in the rain. We happened to go to the new school SSRVM, in kachamaranahalli, and he came. What a crowd, and what a downpour!
It always happens, i get the chance to meet him, I always shy away from it!!! Every single time!
But ya, i don't know, mom says that SSR is like her guru, but me? He's not mine, I'm sure of that. They say that the teacher chooses the student. Well, teacher, WHERE ARE YOU?
I want to learn, ( not calculus)!!!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
Ok ok !!!! c ya!
After that - it will be mauja hi mauja - but only for a few days i suppose, ya, with my parents around, Ive got no choice but to prepare for the other xams that are coming.
:(
Well, the near future is not something i look forward to.
There's nothing in it, nothing at all, it literally is moving on, growing up, letting go, and all that.
wonder if ill get a college in blore.
Man, allopathic docs have such an aversion towards ayurveda!!
Talking about aversions, I'm trying to overcome the stupid aversion i have towards practicing calculus!
There's no secret at all, i just sit with someone and do it, well, so there's no distractions and stuff, but i resent this sort of math all the time.
Give me totalling, simple math, arithmetic, neat algebra, with trigs, or logs, ill do it!
But calculus? Integration? It does not seem to fit anything ! It totally defies the logic i have, and i have very little patience with it.
Its stupid.
Math can be fun. Dad says it's a mental block I have, well, that's not completely true.
I just see no particular help that integrating 1 +logx/ log x would have,
ok well that sum is stupid, ne1 can solvge it,
it was just an wxample, but its useless!!!!!! There's nothing satisfying in doing worthless sums like them!
Ok, so you're looking for satisfaction in math too?
Defi!!!I love solving problems!
Looking at all that integration makes my stomach go phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
Or maybe I'm just hungry. Gotta grab a "bite" then!
Uh oh, eating with mehendi on my hands, will not be easy, hey, they should have that as a task for Roadies 5.0!!!! :)
Its a stupid task anyways, but its worth trying!
When i say fine, doesn't mean its all right. It means whatever. It means i have no choice, that reminds me , thats what SSR was talking about yesterday, in the rain. We happened to go to the new school SSRVM, in kachamaranahalli, and he came. What a crowd, and what a downpour!
It always happens, i get the chance to meet him, I always shy away from it!!! Every single time!
But ya, i don't know, mom says that SSR is like her guru, but me? He's not mine, I'm sure of that. They say that the teacher chooses the student. Well, teacher, WHERE ARE YOU?
I want to learn, ( not calculus)!!!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
phlaakgurglllldrgghfifsoooofthrrrp!
Ok ok !!!! c ya!
Friday, March 14, 2008
Crash, boom bang!
Well, the fucker's at it again.
Look at what i was led into - a no win situation.
Bloody fuck fuck FUCK!!!!!!!!!!
Why is it always pigheadedness? Why is it always refusal?
The fucker got fucked up!
What bullshit! How could I let this happen? Why did i even bother asking?
However do I try and recover? A word of caution, is enough to tear apart stuff! Why didn't I realise where it was taking me?
F.U.C.K!
This requires something I can't take. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Gotta go jump on the bed and scream into the pillow, I'm furious for not doing what i felt like doing!
Why does arrogance always have to triumph? Why does it lead to regret and remorse?
Did I start it? Why, oh why? FUCK man fuck.
Ya, fucked up day, fucked up self esteem, and fucked up energy.
Ive got no enthusiasm.
Where's my relief? Gotcha, the phone, nothing more motivating than a nice, long call.
Here I come, and here i go.
Look at what i was led into - a no win situation.
Bloody fuck fuck FUCK!!!!!!!!!!
Why is it always pigheadedness? Why is it always refusal?
The fucker got fucked up!
What bullshit! How could I let this happen? Why did i even bother asking?
However do I try and recover? A word of caution, is enough to tear apart stuff! Why didn't I realise where it was taking me?
F.U.C.K!
This requires something I can't take. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Gotta go jump on the bed and scream into the pillow, I'm furious for not doing what i felt like doing!
Why does arrogance always have to triumph? Why does it lead to regret and remorse?
Did I start it? Why, oh why? FUCK man fuck.
Ya, fucked up day, fucked up self esteem, and fucked up energy.
Ive got no enthusiasm.
Where's my relief? Gotcha, the phone, nothing more motivating than a nice, long call.
Here I come, and here i go.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Rules.
It so happened that I decided to perform agnihotra yesterday.
Its a sort of puja one does to purify the air around oneself, just takes 10 minutes. Its supposed to be done at sunise and sunset only.
Mom chose a convenient time to tell me to log off the comp and do it. I've never been good with all this, im not that much into puring stuff into fire.
It felt wierd, like I was a sacrificial priest.
But it was a one of a kind experience.
HAs any one felt energy flowing through them? Vibrations? Warmth? Like theres someone whos hugging you?
It felt so ....so different, i was actually upset with my mom for making me get off the comp, but after that, i actually thanked her for making me do that.
I can't wait to do it again!!!!!!
Hope mom gives me another chance, she likes doiing it. I don't blame her, i like it too!
I happened to converse with my junior, and she was complaining about the state of certain "affairs" in school. Well , again, my advising self comes to the forefront, but , must admit, ive never faced a case like tis before, but , it turns out , my advice worked!!!
Well, that;s bcause ive gone through a lot too!
But that was a classic case!!!!Mine was pretty simple, it was obvious, the solution.
Just reminded me of all the stuff we used to do in the 7th, 8th, nd 9th grade.
Try as i might, i just cant seem to be able to type th i's in cap form , its just this involuntary thing which types them all in small!!!!
Stupid!!!
I had just viewed my classmates blog yesterday, he said i was toooooo active while blogging!!!
Ya , well, he's a big bookworm, can do a zillion things at once, but he could not finish reading my blog!!!! A big brain too, excels all the time!
I like his blog, nice sensible stuff, not the crapshit i type!
Again, i cannot type the i's in caps!!
Argh! What to do? What's goin on? humhumhum.....
There is a lot going on that i don't know of.
I can't know everything.
I have the choice. I can say no, i can say yes, i can listen to what i want to hear, and no to what i don't want to hear.
Simple.
Well, since my blog has led to tooooo many questions, I've decided to stop it here. I've decided to do something else.
There are better ways, and ive chosen them.
Its a sort of puja one does to purify the air around oneself, just takes 10 minutes. Its supposed to be done at sunise and sunset only.
Mom chose a convenient time to tell me to log off the comp and do it. I've never been good with all this, im not that much into puring stuff into fire.
It felt wierd, like I was a sacrificial priest.
But it was a one of a kind experience.
HAs any one felt energy flowing through them? Vibrations? Warmth? Like theres someone whos hugging you?
It felt so ....so different, i was actually upset with my mom for making me get off the comp, but after that, i actually thanked her for making me do that.
I can't wait to do it again!!!!!!
Hope mom gives me another chance, she likes doiing it. I don't blame her, i like it too!
I happened to converse with my junior, and she was complaining about the state of certain "affairs" in school. Well , again, my advising self comes to the forefront, but , must admit, ive never faced a case like tis before, but , it turns out , my advice worked!!!
Well, that;s bcause ive gone through a lot too!
But that was a classic case!!!!Mine was pretty simple, it was obvious, the solution.
Just reminded me of all the stuff we used to do in the 7th, 8th, nd 9th grade.
Try as i might, i just cant seem to be able to type th i's in cap form , its just this involuntary thing which types them all in small!!!!
Stupid!!!
I had just viewed my classmates blog yesterday, he said i was toooooo active while blogging!!!
Ya , well, he's a big bookworm, can do a zillion things at once, but he could not finish reading my blog!!!! A big brain too, excels all the time!
I like his blog, nice sensible stuff, not the crapshit i type!
Again, i cannot type the i's in caps!!
Argh! What to do? What's goin on? humhumhum.....
There is a lot going on that i don't know of.
I can't know everything.
I have the choice. I can say no, i can say yes, i can listen to what i want to hear, and no to what i don't want to hear.
Simple.
Well, since my blog has led to tooooo many questions, I've decided to stop it here. I've decided to do something else.
There are better ways, and ive chosen them.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Call names
Well Mr G said that all the names over here were like call names, one never knew who i was referring to.
And from there arises a problem, since no1 knows who i refer to, except myself, there's always an inkling of doubt.
Well sometime ago, Mr M asked me who Mr M was - nd well, ya, there are tooooo many mr M's i know. I need to think of better names.
The wrong people think im referring to them, the right ones think im referring to someone else.
Maybe i should remove the anonymity.
No, i think it should be left as it is. Just to let people know that your blog, is not an open page,
Nor am i!
well , you are, kind of.
I can't believe i had a 3 hour long chat, with one of my most favourite ppl in the world,
Purely coincidental. He was free, and so was I
Why does every conversation start with a " wassup""?
It's a different wassa from different people, but dont people find it a bit too boring?
i sometimes do, no, actually, most of the time.
Ok fine , the other side of the argument could be, how else do we start?
Well it could be anything else, anyway else, a stupid satement, anything!!!!!
but ya, let ppl be themselves, let them do things the way they want to
There's this guy i know from pondicherry. He's watever you want in a normal guy, adding a bit of exuberance, and ummm a bit of lets say, hes a kleptomaniac.
And he drinks. Hes not a drunkard of course,but given the chance, he would drink.
Reminds me of quite a few ppl, i remmbr them suffering.I remember seeing them dead, dying, in the hospital. I remember so much. Thinking about that, mi grandad's deathday, comes this saturday. The day of my bio exam.
I don't know how my mother feels about it. I've seen her cry, I've cried, i loved and respected him so much. Its a pity he had to leave, leaving all my questions unanswered, i lost him. all because his liver couldnt take any more.
Ill miss him most on that day, and so will my mom.
Coming back, i was trying to make him understand that it wasnt good for him. It makes a big loss to a person's life. Ive known it. Ive seen it.
He just would not understand. Why do I keep butting my head against such brick walls?
Like my "master" said, just dont even bother, let them realise. Ill drop it.
Ive dropped it.
Mr M's supposed to be going away forever . He's leaving blore.
Well, can't say ill miss him, cant say that i'd forget him either.
Ill just never forget him, thats it.
Ive got to let him go. This is the end of the road, and whatever connection we had, is not meant to be. I have to let you go.
Wonder how though. Will all those "old man" nd "kiddo" IM's.
Ironic, he leaves the day my exams end. Too ironic.
But hell yes, ill always wish the best for you.
Gotta get a move on now!!!!
Im getting too senti!!
And from there arises a problem, since no1 knows who i refer to, except myself, there's always an inkling of doubt.
Well sometime ago, Mr M asked me who Mr M was - nd well, ya, there are tooooo many mr M's i know. I need to think of better names.
The wrong people think im referring to them, the right ones think im referring to someone else.
Maybe i should remove the anonymity.
No, i think it should be left as it is. Just to let people know that your blog, is not an open page,
Nor am i!
well , you are, kind of.
I can't believe i had a 3 hour long chat, with one of my most favourite ppl in the world,
Purely coincidental. He was free, and so was I
Why does every conversation start with a " wassup""?
It's a different wassa from different people, but dont people find it a bit too boring?
i sometimes do, no, actually, most of the time.
Ok fine , the other side of the argument could be, how else do we start?
Well it could be anything else, anyway else, a stupid satement, anything!!!!!
but ya, let ppl be themselves, let them do things the way they want to
There's this guy i know from pondicherry. He's watever you want in a normal guy, adding a bit of exuberance, and ummm a bit of lets say, hes a kleptomaniac.
And he drinks. Hes not a drunkard of course,but given the chance, he would drink.
Reminds me of quite a few ppl, i remmbr them suffering.I remember seeing them dead, dying, in the hospital. I remember so much. Thinking about that, mi grandad's deathday, comes this saturday. The day of my bio exam.
I don't know how my mother feels about it. I've seen her cry, I've cried, i loved and respected him so much. Its a pity he had to leave, leaving all my questions unanswered, i lost him. all because his liver couldnt take any more.
Ill miss him most on that day, and so will my mom.
Coming back, i was trying to make him understand that it wasnt good for him. It makes a big loss to a person's life. Ive known it. Ive seen it.
He just would not understand. Why do I keep butting my head against such brick walls?
Like my "master" said, just dont even bother, let them realise. Ill drop it.
Ive dropped it.
Mr M's supposed to be going away forever . He's leaving blore.
Well, can't say ill miss him, cant say that i'd forget him either.
Ill just never forget him, thats it.
Ive got to let him go. This is the end of the road, and whatever connection we had, is not meant to be. I have to let you go.
Wonder how though. Will all those "old man" nd "kiddo" IM's.
Ironic, he leaves the day my exams end. Too ironic.
But hell yes, ill always wish the best for you.
Gotta get a move on now!!!!
Im getting too senti!!
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Thoughts.
A different view.
Well around 2 days ago, i was watching this lady talking to anothe about how to live a normal life. To listen to the signs, to watch where what was leading to ,and to think inward.
Well, the wa she said it made it seem so simple, and not like the high strung stuff i usually hear - like i have to try and give up all desires to attain the supreme.
Well, for a common individual like me, i don't find that fun, possible, or worth doing.
And when i heard this lady speak, about how, and why we should read the signs.
She took the example of traveling from one place to another. She asked, don't we stop by for petrol? In the same way, we must stop to see the fuel indicator to see where we stand.
If we don't stop to refuel the car, somewhere along the road, the car will stop, by itself.
Put yourself in the same case. If you don't pause, for just a minute and ponder about the direction of your actions, the journey is a little more than futile. If we don't pause, when we get exhausted and break down, we will have to go through a lot more to get back to the initial state of mind.
The same case with our thoughts and our impressions of people. The impressions of people are got through first, memories, outside information, and third, through beliefs.
Also, right now, the journey is taken as a race. A race to win. You compare your speed with thaat of your competitor, not cheking to see if you are comfortable with the speed at which you drive.
Its best to filter your thoughts, just pause for a minute and accept things to be the way they are.
Acceptance means that the mind should not be in a state of turmoil. Acceptance does not mean that that the situation is ok the way it is. That it cannot be changed. It can be.
Take for instance , the maid doesn't come one day. You have the choice to grumble and be grumpy that day or - you can accept that she hasnt come, and be a little less upset, when you have to do the housework all by yourself.
But in today's world, where people believe that anger is necessary, tension is natural , and that "i fight to win" is the motto of today, when did we allow these thoughts to enter our heads.
All we have do do is accept. The cycle goes like this - thought, action, memory, habit, experience, opportunity, destiny.
Here people say something, feel something else, and yet believe something else. We have all been conditioned to be actors, but we do no realise that we hurt ourselves more, first. How will the other person know we act? Say what you have to, but do ponder about what has to be said and done.
Well, i seem to have typed too much. Maybe all this has been said elsewhere, a thousand million billion times, but I understood this, Its like ive gone through life to apply myself to everything she said.
Acceptance. The first step to creating a better destiny.
Well around 2 days ago, i was watching this lady talking to anothe about how to live a normal life. To listen to the signs, to watch where what was leading to ,and to think inward.
Well, the wa she said it made it seem so simple, and not like the high strung stuff i usually hear - like i have to try and give up all desires to attain the supreme.
Well, for a common individual like me, i don't find that fun, possible, or worth doing.
And when i heard this lady speak, about how, and why we should read the signs.
She took the example of traveling from one place to another. She asked, don't we stop by for petrol? In the same way, we must stop to see the fuel indicator to see where we stand.
If we don't stop to refuel the car, somewhere along the road, the car will stop, by itself.
Put yourself in the same case. If you don't pause, for just a minute and ponder about the direction of your actions, the journey is a little more than futile. If we don't pause, when we get exhausted and break down, we will have to go through a lot more to get back to the initial state of mind.
The same case with our thoughts and our impressions of people. The impressions of people are got through first, memories, outside information, and third, through beliefs.
Also, right now, the journey is taken as a race. A race to win. You compare your speed with thaat of your competitor, not cheking to see if you are comfortable with the speed at which you drive.
Its best to filter your thoughts, just pause for a minute and accept things to be the way they are.
Acceptance means that the mind should not be in a state of turmoil. Acceptance does not mean that that the situation is ok the way it is. That it cannot be changed. It can be.
Take for instance , the maid doesn't come one day. You have the choice to grumble and be grumpy that day or - you can accept that she hasnt come, and be a little less upset, when you have to do the housework all by yourself.
But in today's world, where people believe that anger is necessary, tension is natural , and that "i fight to win" is the motto of today, when did we allow these thoughts to enter our heads.
All we have do do is accept. The cycle goes like this - thought, action, memory, habit, experience, opportunity, destiny.
Here people say something, feel something else, and yet believe something else. We have all been conditioned to be actors, but we do no realise that we hurt ourselves more, first. How will the other person know we act? Say what you have to, but do ponder about what has to be said and done.
Well, i seem to have typed too much. Maybe all this has been said elsewhere, a thousand million billion times, but I understood this, Its like ive gone through life to apply myself to everything she said.
Acceptance. The first step to creating a better destiny.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Facts
Oh joy, seems again i'm all tongue tied.
Wish i knew the difference between where to stop and where to start
So, tomorrow's women's day, and we all plan to go out, and just .....go out. Nothing lavish, nothing great. just going out.
And being a family
The facts stand as below -
1)What people say is or can be very misleading. Very, for the simple reason that - eithr wat they say is not what they meant to say, or is not properly understood .Same with their actions, they can be very misleading.
2)Whatever happens, happens for a reason, if you weren't able to make it to school on time, it's for a reason. The only catch is that we don't kno what the reason is.
3)All the above is something that's called "words of wisdom"
I don't care about words of wisdom.
I need the truth. No vague answers.
that's another fact. I ask. I want answers.
Here i am, surrounded by nonsense, looking for that one grain of truth. I don't give a damn if it hurts or not, but i want it. Actually, it does matter if it hurts or not, but its better than reciprcating emotions for a downright lie.
I wish i was more than human.
So that i could understand what life's all about.
What death is. What we do after we die, what we become, what our mission is.
Mom says that, the fact that these questions arise from me is a very good sign. That i don't take what is around me for granted.
She's already advanced. Way beyond.
Shivaratri is one day, i ask all my questions to Shiva. After all, he destroys, so he would know the answer, and would also "destroy" mi questions.
I got answers, but all in a wierd way. Haven't yet figured out the meaning.
THIS BLOG POST IS B.O.R.I.N.G. BBBBBOOOOORRRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGG
i dint ask you to read it . Its sumthing i write what i think about.
Oh totally forgot, was chatting with my frieng , hes Mr G. A totally "careful" "caring" "carefree" guy.
We were tokin about a lot, which was when the topic of tru happiness, also known as "bliss" came up.
And my days were all not blissful. I complain, a lot, dammit. About the fluff in the world, and the stuff it hides.
He's a great motivator, can change a grin to an ear-to ear smile.
Thanks, mr G. i o u 1.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Daily tidbits ( only not that tasty)
Hi
Today was boring. I been struggling with my duvet, it went all squishy wishy in the cover, all side ways and tangled up!. So here is was, duvet over my shoulder tugging the bottom, gave up, threw it to the bed, and sat down all upset, hehehe. I did it in the end though, no help from anyone...aww :)
Today was kinda horrible. And i'm sleepy, have been waking up at 3am to go to the toilet, so, tonight i should be alright. I'm sitting here yawning and it's only 8 40 am!. Think i'll go off pc, and sleep a little bit :), but ya, who can, with d next bord xam, around the corner?
My writing is going great, i'm just pissed it all goes into romantic crap, i really can't be bothered anymore you know, i'm not that good any way, i dont write about smell, or how people look, or how they feel do i :(
Balls to them all newais, i had just gone to d market to get groceries nd stuff, which is when just in front of the crowded shop, my money fell. IT was all notes actually, so i thot it would all blow away.!!
I was so suprised. All the people around me there bent down to pick up watever had fallen and returned it to me. There was this one guy in particular , who had picked up quite a bit.
Every one knows the usual courtesy -"Thank you". But when i looked into his eyes, i saw something else. I saw them shining,( not with tears, thats stupid) but definetli, they lookd ablaze.
Honestly, its what do you call it, shyness or whatever,u kno to act more womanly, and shield your eyes from his gaze. I just couldn't stop looking. i wasnt staring, u kno, d gawking sorta thing,
Thats when he said - yea heres your money. Gow did you just let it slip off your hands like that?
I really dont know how it happened - is what i hear myself say.
Thank you
Your welcome - and there he goes, giving me a smile. i walked back home, wierd as tho it may seem, i felt ive seen him somewhere before, i know that face.
and now he knows mine.
It had its disadvantages though, i wasnt able to concentrate on finishing my least favorite chapter in physics - electrostatics.
And yes, ive finally found who i was looking for, a guy who was looking for me!!!
yipee..... it shud be YIPEEE!!!!
honestli, he was looking for me, but he dint know how, i knew where to find him, and i did. onli a bit too late, he might have lost it.
look at me - the way im typing- again, it went into men adn romantic crapshit ... i have no story lines, i just kinda gabble on till i run out of words.
stupid.
but yes, dad should be quizzing me soon
btw, for all those looking here for a more personal view of myself - YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET IT HERE.
This is a blog. Not a profile page.
One of my friends said that people look at a blog to get the inside information about a person.
I think ppl get a lot of inside info about me from here, they either refuse to believe or they don't understand.
Thank you, mr M for letting me off the hook. I thot it was my fault. Im just letting you go. You can leave, No strings attached.
Today was boring. I been struggling with my duvet, it went all squishy wishy in the cover, all side ways and tangled up!. So here is was, duvet over my shoulder tugging the bottom, gave up, threw it to the bed, and sat down all upset, hehehe. I did it in the end though, no help from anyone...aww :)
Today was kinda horrible. And i'm sleepy, have been waking up at 3am to go to the toilet, so, tonight i should be alright. I'm sitting here yawning and it's only 8 40 am!. Think i'll go off pc, and sleep a little bit :), but ya, who can, with d next bord xam, around the corner?
My writing is going great, i'm just pissed it all goes into romantic crap, i really can't be bothered anymore you know, i'm not that good any way, i dont write about smell, or how people look, or how they feel do i :(
Balls to them all newais, i had just gone to d market to get groceries nd stuff, which is when just in front of the crowded shop, my money fell. IT was all notes actually, so i thot it would all blow away.!!
I was so suprised. All the people around me there bent down to pick up watever had fallen and returned it to me. There was this one guy in particular , who had picked up quite a bit.
Every one knows the usual courtesy -"Thank you". But when i looked into his eyes, i saw something else. I saw them shining,( not with tears, thats stupid) but definetli, they lookd ablaze.
Honestly, its what do you call it, shyness or whatever,u kno to act more womanly, and shield your eyes from his gaze. I just couldn't stop looking. i wasnt staring, u kno, d gawking sorta thing,
Thats when he said - yea heres your money. Gow did you just let it slip off your hands like that?
I really dont know how it happened - is what i hear myself say.
Thank you
Your welcome - and there he goes, giving me a smile. i walked back home, wierd as tho it may seem, i felt ive seen him somewhere before, i know that face.
and now he knows mine.
It had its disadvantages though, i wasnt able to concentrate on finishing my least favorite chapter in physics - electrostatics.
And yes, ive finally found who i was looking for, a guy who was looking for me!!!
yipee..... it shud be YIPEEE!!!!
honestli, he was looking for me, but he dint know how, i knew where to find him, and i did. onli a bit too late, he might have lost it.
look at me - the way im typing- again, it went into men adn romantic crapshit ... i have no story lines, i just kinda gabble on till i run out of words.
stupid.
but yes, dad should be quizzing me soon
btw, for all those looking here for a more personal view of myself - YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET IT HERE.
This is a blog. Not a profile page.
One of my friends said that people look at a blog to get the inside information about a person.
I think ppl get a lot of inside info about me from here, they either refuse to believe or they don't understand.
Thank you, mr M for letting me off the hook. I thot it was my fault. Im just letting you go. You can leave, No strings attached.
Monday, March 3, 2008
forgotten
Me and dad were discussing semiconducters yesterday. My favorite chapter, and he works with those diodes, so we put our brains to the test, to see who knew more.
It ended with the obvious. Dad knew a lot more, obviously, he's been working with them for around 14 years. I did give good fight though.
Mi cousin was ol yesterday too, had a one way voice chat. I couldn't type as fast as they spoke!!! ( he and his wife, that is).
So the call ended quick, with another fervent plea for dad to buy us a mike.
I finally changed the favicon. Took me 3 tries and my all of my neighbours patience.
He was busy. Should have chosen a better time to butt in.
What's happened has happened, and he lost half an hour trying to make you understand the Internet's complications.
i did apologise! What more can i do?
Coming back to the moment, the song "unwritten" by natasha beddingfield seems to do its job.
This is the only song of hers that i like. her" i wanna hav ur babies" is crazy. Its hard to believe it stayed at the top of the charts for 2 weeks!!!
Vin loves that song,thats another matter.
a must listen song , to all those unprepared for every day.
Just the way i like it.
It ended with the obvious. Dad knew a lot more, obviously, he's been working with them for around 14 years. I did give good fight though.
Mi cousin was ol yesterday too, had a one way voice chat. I couldn't type as fast as they spoke!!! ( he and his wife, that is).
So the call ended quick, with another fervent plea for dad to buy us a mike.
I finally changed the favicon. Took me 3 tries and my all of my neighbours patience.
He was busy. Should have chosen a better time to butt in.
What's happened has happened, and he lost half an hour trying to make you understand the Internet's complications.
i did apologise! What more can i do?
Coming back to the moment, the song "unwritten" by natasha beddingfield seems to do its job.
This is the only song of hers that i like. her" i wanna hav ur babies" is crazy. Its hard to believe it stayed at the top of the charts for 2 weeks!!!
Vin loves that song,thats another matter.
a must listen song , to all those unprepared for every day.
Just the way i like it.
Saturday, March 1, 2008
ONe down four t go!
well , out board exams commenced yestrda, with one of the most boring subjects, chemistry.
I like chemistry. Fiddling with the vvarious substances in the world , is fascinating. But the way our NCERT puts it, makes it look like dry rot.
It takes every ounce of resolve to plod on with studying them.
And our teachers, excludin JSR, make it so much more uninteresting, like making exciting explosive reactions sound as boring as fishing in the lake!
BUt , managed to bite , chew, nd spit it all out onto the paper. Good enough for the effort, the paper cud hav bin much more worse.
I dont expect much in chem, but bio , phy nd eng, nothn belo 95. It cant b lowr dan dat!!!...i lover dose subs!!!...nd i want to do well in dem!
Ive got another ...lets c 5 days to get dat 100 in phy. So lets do it!!!
Im actually aiming for a centum. This is unbelievable! THe last time i did was in 10th.
FInally got in touch wid Rad yestrda!.... Were so compatible! toking abt the " Long haird ppl" is one of mi fav things to do with her!
Thot id do a bit of artistry on paint. The outcomes are as shown above.
Was well appreciated , with the reply, y dyu start with hearts all the time???
SO the next thing i dd was dat one...tyhe blak nd white -
well, mom calld it a mitochondria.
Others called it wormy.
I calld it abstract. Ive got all sorts of them plastered all over in my room. THe dont lok as fat and ugly like this one, but cute and , ...i like them. So does everyone else. We used to style our names this way.
Calls came from overseas , near and far, to wish me atb for mi bords!. Honestli , FELT SOOOO GOOOD!!!!
" so how r u nd ur guy goin"??? askd one of mi relatives.
were goin on fine. is mi repli. we re takin things slow now.
"Dont get too distractd by u kno wat." is wat comes as the answer.
yes yes, bro, im not gonna follow in ur footsteps.!!!! hahaha......( obviosli i was kidding, he was such a studi studi guy ( at that time))
"hav fun, dont mug toomuch, ull forget" thhere........
ok anna , will keep dat in mind. dont booze too much ok?
"sure sis. nd keep the sights quiet."
I havnt spoken to him in ages. yet we tok like it was jst yestrday.
How the paths have turned!
How much weve all gone astray! Not lookin bak to c wat has happnd to the oders.
Pity.
Reminds me, one of mi old friends who kinda mmmmm lets say " brushed me off" calld to wish me all d best.
As good as his intentions were, I wasnt feeling good .
pity. PPl we leave behind. People leave us behind.Progress isnt it? From the third world to the developing to the developd, in wich case developd is wrt a robot.
Here's another chat i had just recently - between me and Truth: u know these days time is not gud for me
me time is not gud for u as in wat?
Truth: as in i m in delemma
me: y?
wat happnd?
Truth: actually its a big issue
6:28 PM 1 gal love me since last 2 yrs and i came to know this few monthsbcak
6:29 PM i refused her as i was not having any inclination towards her
but she now says that she can live without me and all such things
i dont know how to handle this
tell me something
wht shud i do
6:30 PM me: how well do u kno her?
Truth: she was my class mate in my graduaitons
i mean for 2 yrs
but she was never my frnd
i mean hardly did i speak to her
6:31 PM in d dream i never thought of such things happening
only god knows whts goin in gals mind and heart
me: meb u shud tell her u never thot of her in dat wa
Truth: now she remains sick and doesnt eat also
i told her
me: shes sufferin from DEPRESSION!
6:32 PM Truth: she doesnt say anything but... recently her sister called me up and said that she is not eating anything and is sick and i m responsible for it
now wht can i do to help her
6:33 PM me: hav u visitd her?
Truth: i mean i know she is very simple
ya i met her a month ago when i was in lucknow
me: u shud c her now
Truth: u know she use to send me msgs and call b during last few yrs...but i thought that she is just wana b frnd
me: wenevr at d earlies
6:34 PM just b wid herfor time
Truth: i m in noida and she is in lucknow
me: nd tell her....how horrible d realitonship wud be
Truth: u know she gave me a gold pendant on my bday
me: dats d onli thing u cn do
Truth: but i refuse to take tat
Since wen dd i become an advisor? am i dr love r sumtin? how do i kno. hav i experiencd such stuff?? no!
im above all dat. True d hurt lingers for a while, but its a nu day ahead. Y wud i want to ruin dat?
It all leads to one conclusin. Your heart belongs to u. and onli u. No1 else.and ur bf ,o crs.
I prefer to think of it as " i dont give mi heart easily" .
ok chal, u seem to hav typed a bit too much now.
Mom nd dad shud b bak soon.
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